I'm in a similar situation of being olde being read as a man in a dress, and just not worrying about it anymore, Like you I am patient, and a succesful day is just being ignored. I take care to avoid provoking people, in the manner of a .person who can afford to be gracious, since I am not afraid or uncertain.

That said, there is a huge biological expectation that everyone is going to try to get along and follow the expected gender patterns. My broadcasting a gender variant message is quite upsetting to a lot of people. They really aren't sure what to do, and while for the most part they just set their jaws, are exaggeratedly polite, or perhaps are sarcastically affirming, all because I look ridiculous.to them and somehow not understanding, they feel, the magnitude of my misdirection.

I feel for them. Once I fully accepted my own need to dress in women's clothing, and understand the limits of my innate portion of womanhood, I find that sometimes I now want to pass as a man just to make life easier for others and subtract the unnessary tension from my life of bothering them!

Gender is messaging, and it is a painful situation to be trying to communicate a fact about our gender that does not meet with an ordinary kind of acceptance. I think a lot of it is because our sexuality is uncertain. Women aren't sure if we are competing or still men who might desire them, and men feel we are either failed men or sexual targets, or whatever way they conceptualize females.

When that becomes a non issue, such as where I am just working on something with someone, or having conversations about ordinary things, my clothing becomes a non issue. Strange, yes, but impactful- no more.