I agree- found that my being trans is not a problem for most observers as long as I don't make it a problem for them. I am sympathetic with those who want theoretical freedoms, but insisting on them when others aren't ready does just amount to starting a fight over power. Being a minority of any kind necessarily will work against asserting dominance, and the irony is that just asking for more acceptance or respect or understanding than someone is prepared to give will feel to them like a demand, an assertion of personal power, and elicit a backlash.