Hi Mark,

I am glad you are taking on the destructive culture of masculinity, and trying for a comprehensive review and restructuring.

I would like to suggest modifications to the definition of the ‘man box’ cultural training, from :

“Man box culture, the way by which boys and men are bullied into forming their masculine identity is:

a) deeply socially isolating

b) denigrating of women.”

to

a} destructive of our true identity and personally isolating, [and thereby]

b) blinding us to and devaluing the rich and diverse individuality of females and our common set of needs.

In my experience, the most fundamental element of, as you so correctly say, bullying a boy into the man box, is to dismiss his actual range of emotions, require submission to control by powerful males, and reinforce and protect dominance behaviors towards females as a compensatory benefit.

The fact that boys all have to be bullied into becoming ‘real men’ should be evidence enough that ‘real men’ aren’t ‘real’ at all. And the pain of that transition is projected out onto society and susceptible females endlessly.