Hi Erica,

Thank you for writing back. I agree with many of your points. Does this quote from the talk you cited summarize the problem we face as a society trying to understand and rightly deal with gender, and rationalizing it with our biological sex?

“If we wish to maintain women’s rights and protect women’s spaces, we cannot separate women from femaleness. It is irrational and dangerous. It makes women and girls vulnerable. Beyond that, there is absolutely no reason why we can’t protect the rights of individuals to step outside gender roles, and to express themselves as they like, and also understand that sexual dimorphism is real, that males and females exist, and that those differences matter.

We still don’t know what defines a trans person. We don’t know what makes a male actually a woman. There is, to date, no coherent definition of “transgender.” It can be anything or anyone. It is nothing more than an unverifiable announcement. And to create legislation around something completely vague and undefinable seems odd to me, if not dangerous”.

I think it is clear to everyone that dimorphism in biological sex is a material reality, and an important one. It is fundamental to reproduction and … humans have build widely varying cultural and social structures around our differences.

A huge set of norms, privileges, rights, restraints, and obligations are established and maintained, and categorized as for ‘men’ or ‘women’. What is not clear to everyone, apparently, is that this cultural baggage is separate from anatomical destiny. Many arguments about gender arise because we fail to distinguish between anatomical gender [male and female] or social gender [man and woman].

Can we trust males who say they are women, or trust females to execute men’s privileges?

There is a lot of individual variation in human character, and many children find themselves not feeling particularly congruent with the set of options allowed for them because of their anatomy.

One example of personal resolution of this conflict: “I am a woman because I am female, but I am free to adopt and practice the cultural privileges normally associated with men and normally reserved for males.”

The ‘women’s liberation’ movement has been hard at work for decades to accomplish this.

Another might be: “ I am a male, but for all intents and purposes other than being able to bear children, I feel like I am a woman- I have the emotional range, I prefer the social and cultural place, and I do not find any incongruity with that. I am not a threat to other women in any way. I am male, but it is wrong, though an understandable mistake, for others to point to my anatomy and say that I am a ‘man’. “

This kind of statement alarms females who feel good about being women in society, but feel unsafe with males. They don’t trust males, as they feel certain that biology is destiny- that males are predatory in nature. Sexual pressure and violence is a terrible thing, and widespread, so the logical protective strategy, with the seductive justification [anatomical divergence and secondary sex characteristics] is to declare that only females can be considered women and access women’s spaces.

Yet another individual might say” I am not anchored in one of the two named social genders. I don’t feel that I am a ‘man’ as defined by my society, or a ‘woman’. However, I don’t always feel in the middle. I feel at times like I am feeling and behaving exactly as expected of women and thought of as ‘womanly’, and it is a deep and radical change from how I interact with the world when I feel manly. “

This latter quote represents how I experience life. I would argue that it is not lack of clarity, but enhanced clarity that I am experiencing. I can see how formulaic so much gender behavior is and how much pain is inflicted on males and females by enforcement of gender rules, not to mention the simple loss of human potential. The feminist movement is trying to grapple with just this issue- how to fully expand the opportunity sphere for females, while still maintaining membership in limited identity set that defines ‘women’.

I personally think that if we fully separate anatomy from our ideas about gender, we will be more successful. You are either male or female, and you can freely choose elements from the cultural description of ‘man’ or ‘woman’ as you go through your day. But in this view, we would no longer subscribe to the idea that ‘man’ and ‘woman’ are real classifications. We would say things like I am being gentle, or responsive, or assertive, or brave,- etc. which is far more descriptive and useful!